And so it begins..

Woo hoo.. proper diet starts today! I want to get down to 90lbs and sp far i weigh 141lbs. Brilliant. Today I ate..

• A small bowl of cereal.


• 10 almonds.


• an apple,


• a sweet potato and peas.

I don't think that's too bad for the first day..

I know I can do better though.. just have to try and cut calories whenever and wherever I can..

Tai chi tomorrow! Buzz buzz! :)

Thanks for reading,

Chloe x

Thinspo.

I think I need some motivation..

swagger

it's sunny today.. i got my swagger back a tiny bit. That was until I caught my reflection in the mirror. I was wearing my netball skirt... my God I actually look bigger than yesterday. it scares me so much. I need some help..thinspo?
I desperatly need to loose weight.. went on a 5 mile run today.. feel a tiny bit less gross. still gross though.
Depression not too bad today.. still get odd bouts. Dad said he would give me the keys to the gun cabinet next time so I could actually do a good job of it. K.



keep me strong,

Chloe x

It's a new dawn, it's a new day..

New day... still feel depressed though. I didn't sleep a wink last night. Can't write later as the boyfriend is over.


chloe x

Depression is getting bad again. I can feel it creeping up and descending over me. I threw out all of my pills though, yay me :) It's so hard to stop myself.. but I've nearly been clean of pills and self harm for a year.. 1st of april. trying to think of reasons to live is so hard, but I'm managing.

theres no place like home..

Well, just chucked all of the food out of my room as I'm having a clear out.. It's like poison how much temptation is in here! The diet starts on monday, as I've just had my birthday so have got fairly fat. I weigh like, 140 pounds now! It's too much. I'm going to stick to a really low calorie diet as of monday, like 500 per day. I'm also going to get up at 5 instead of 6 and go for a run as I love running :)
I don't know how I'm going to deal with this diet.. it's going to be really hard. I can't believe how fat I have let myself become. :( Ahh well.. no one's fault but mine I guess. Now I have to face the consequences. Buzzing -_-

Wish me luck!
I will keep you informed on my progress when I start :)
Chloe x